New Year's Thoughts

Depending on your sense of humor, we have a new year.  I see this year as a chance to make positive, healthy changes.  Of course, we can always keep on doing what we always do -- muck up potential opportunties.  I forgot what television or cartoon character used to say, "Time's awasting."  You know what, we do waste time.  Then again, there are times when we have to wait for things to happen.  Either way, life is all about how you spend your time and how you can change toxic thoughts into healthy thoughts,

What do you want to do?  Me?  I welcome change, even though there will be times I find myself kicking, screaming and fighting it.  What keeps me grounded is the "Wizard of Oz."  Not the book -- the movie.  Remember when the wicked witch wrote the words "Surrender Dorothy" overhead?  Surrendering allows the Creator to take our thoughts, wishes and dreams and make small miracles happen. 

The memories of my childhood still brings a smile to my face.  I cannot divorce myself from my past -- my childhood -- the dreams I had and disillusionments that often followed.  I would not be the person I am today if all of these experiences did not occur.  I am the sum total of the changes that occurred in my life as well as the choices I made.  You are the sum total of your experiences as well.  It is good to remember and remind yourself of where you came from and what you have accomplished, rather than be concerned about what you still want to accomplish.

The new year, start out fresh -- like newly fallen snow before someone tromps on it and the cars make it slushy and dirty.  As a child, I remember wanting to run outside and make angels in the snow.  The sound of the crunch of snow under my boots and the caress of the brisk air of a cold Chicago winter are still locked into my brain and memory.  I cannot turn the clock back, but I can remember.  Then reality hits.

I have gotten older.  Many, too many, of my high school and grade school classmates have transitione into the spiritual realm.  These are people I consider my family.  Why?  We grew up together.  We shared experiences -- likes dislikes, dreams, and oh, all sorts of things.  Children and teenagers do that. 

We do not live forever in physical form.  Our bodies are not designed that way.  We are like our automobiles -- our parts wear out and sometimes need to be replaced.  We have a finite period of time on this planet.  Why don't we all focus on what we want to change and embrace.  Life is short.  We do not know how much time we have left here.  This is a new year.  This is the year where I'm going all out.  I'm going to live my life fully, completely and do a ton more of writing.  I was put on this planet to share thoughts, ideas, and be spiritual teacher -- ok, with a Tarot deck in my hand as well.

My new year's goal, yes it is a goal, to do consistent blogging, writing and sharing my wealth of knowledge and the wisdom gained.  What is your new year's goal?  Tell me. 

Perfection -- nah!

What is perfection?  Everyone has their own answer to that question.  What makes something perfect?  How knit-picky, analytical or critical do we have to be before we say -- enough!  How much input from others, you know a critique that occasionally borders on an insult, should we take to heart?  How many people, who we value as authorities, have been honest with us throughout our lives? 

Twenty/twenty hindsight is our best teacher.  I bet if you look back at your life you will see at least one incident of having been knocked down and kicked (not necessarily physically) by someone you loved or respected.  I would also bet that you may have thought or believed that you deserved it, and then possibly beat yourself up over it.  On the other hand, it may be quite possible that you may have had the awareness to say, "What the ...?"  Age has a wonderful way of showing us the wisdom we have gained through living, and if we are willing, provides us with more opportunity to say, this is as good as it gets.  I'm fine with what I've done.

So, what is my point here?  It's all about self esteem/self worth. 

Many of us go through life beating ourselves up trying to please others, do our jobs, create art in some form, or anything whatever, only to have someone trash us.  The problem is, we often accept other people's opinions of what is good or perfect.  Perfection is as subjective as art.  Everyone has an opinion.  Some we agree with and others we do not.

Everything we do depends upon the standards we set for ourselves or those we abide by, depending on the situation.  What is important is we should be happy with whatever we have done whether or not someone else is happy with it.  OK, so we are graded, judged, appreciated, reprimanded, etc.  That is a fact of life.  We should do our best at any given moment.  If we are having an off day, we can blame it on an astrological aspect or some cycle.  Even better, we should just take responsibility for what we did or didn't do as well as we normally would.  Life's like that.

The most important thing to remember is we have the ability to see what we went through, whether the person who committed the act of trashing us ever realized they were doing so at the time.  Jealousy does exist, but why should we live our lives worrying about the negative stuff.  "Don't sweat the small stuff."

Not every day is perfect.  Not everyone behaves perfectly.  Isn't that terrific?  I think so.  Perfection to me is having things come together and being able to make people ... and myself happy.  If it works, this is excellent, nah, it's Perfect.   

When I grow up I want to be...

When we are children, we often make all sorts of wishes. We wish on a star, on a four-leaf clover, include them as part of our prayers, and through other means. If we look back (20/20 hindsight), these wishes are eventually granted. However they may not be granted immediately or they way we expect. They may take dozens of years to come to fruition. How do I know this...I've been reading Tarot cards and Palm for over 30 years.

Here's an example of four of mine that have come to pass:

Wishes No. 1 and 2 - I wanted to be a teacher and I also wanted to be psychic like my dad. When he was alive, I used to say, "If I had one quarter of his abilities I would be thrilled." My dad used to tell me, "The student should surpass his/her teacher." While I thought I might actually teach school, it never occurred to me that I might teach unconventionally -- Tarot in the continuing education department of a community college. Bingo. It has come to pass, not necessarily the way I envisioned it. But it happened -- both wishes granted.

Last night I experienced the gifts of a young woman -- a Reiki practitioner who works with Archangels Michael and Gabriel. She was directed to register/take my Practical Tarot II - Minor Arcana class. With no actual knowledge of Tarot, her intuitive gifts blew me out of the water. Her abilities remind me of when I first started reading Tarot -- full on intuition with very little knowledge of the cards. She's amazingly clairaudient. I know she will bring great joy to the world as she continues on her path. I am blessed to learn she was directed to me. What an honor from the angels. - Wishes 1 and 2 granted.

Wish No. 3 - I wanted to be a nurse. While I didn't make it into nursing school, which was probably the best thing in the world, I discovered that my intuitive abilities with/without Tarot -- ok clairaudience, allows me to provide information for people who are begining to heal, or need input as they continue to heal from their emotional issues. When I was 18, I was a trance medium. After my father died, that was the end of my mediumship abilities, or so I thought. For the past four months or so, I have been communicating with people who have crossed over during the course of my Tarot/intuitive work. There are times when the information I receive, along with the character and personality traits of loved ones, amazes me. Now I truly understand the power of the gifts of John Edwards, James van Praagh and Theresa Caputo, the Long Island medium. My gift works differently than theirs. I still provide messages, but somehow, I have to hold a Tarot deck in my hand...and I also do other types of readings -- not just crossover work. So, while I may not be a nurse, I am definitely one who ministers to the well being of others. -- Wish No. 3 granted.

Wish No. 4 - I wanted to be an actor. Well, I did pursue it as a career, in Chicago when I was in my 30s. I had a few good print jobs and voiceover bookings. The improvisational and scene study classes I attended provided information that has been beneficial to me in many ways. For example, from improv, I learned to "be in the moment." If we live in our heads, we are not really living. There is a time for imagination and fantasy, but for day-to-day living, staying grounded and present is necessary. Through scene work, I realized that conflict provides for the growth of individuals and the clearing up and creation of karma. While emotional outbursts makes for great entertainment -- drama, in real life, temperance and understanding is what is needed. To quote my mother, "Maturity is the ability to exercise self control." -- Wish No. 4 granted...I am an entertainer, not necessarily an actor.

So, I have gotten all four wishes in one -- not necessarily the way I expected, but perfect for me just the same.

To sum things up, I am an instrument of angels and others. My wishes were granted and on that level, I am at peace and content -- living in the present and living passionately.

Are you willing to share your "when I grow up story... and how it turned out?"

Did you get the message?

Most of us know what it's like when our intuition, guides, ancestors, angels, etc. try to help us, right? We often stumble, literally, seeking information or answers to our most burning questions, but fail to make the connection. I learned to acknowledge that we get what we need when we need it and that "getting" tends to save the day, bail our bottoms out, and pave the way for new opportunities, or better ways of handling current or ongoing situations. This is a "truism," at least in my world it is.

Then, I had an "aha moment" the other day. While speaking with a close friend, and without divulging a private conversation, I made a major connection -- Free Will. Part of the conversation revolved around listening to guides, or intuition if you prefer that word, and why they don't tell us directly what to do. Actually they do in life-threatening situations, but not when it comes to other choices we need to make!

Here's the message that I would like to share with you: When my guides tell me something, it is generally in the form of these types of questions:

• "Why don't you do ____________?"
  
• "Are you sure you want to say that?"
  
• "Are you sure you want to do that?"

I equate these conversations to the words of wisdom uttered by the Scarecrow in the "Wizard of Oz" when Dorothy couldn't decide which direction to take when she came to the end of the "Yellow Brick Road." He suggested two choices -- left or right. Dorothy ultimately chose her path and the Scarecrow came along to guide her. Guides are always with us.

The missing piece has always been the fact that we have free will. Too often, we keep making the same choices we always have, or some variation thereof. This may or may not take us where we want to go, or we take a mis-step from time to time. Maybe it's time to choose differently -- and wisely. A new perspective might take us somewhere else -- to a new experience that may enhance our lives. Dorothy ended up in Oz. I don't think I want to be filed neatly under "R" in the "O-Z" filing cabinet. I want to get to the Emerald City -- my Emerald City. By understanding that my guides really tell me what to do, I need to...

• To trust the questions they ask me,
• Get out of my own logic,
  
• Know that I have the wisdom to avoid doing something "stupid," and
  
• Know that I must make my own choices.

Sometimes it sounds like my father's voice channeling through my guides. Could my father be working with/through them? I did say ancestors, didn't I?

It is all about FREE WILL. The one thing I strive to do as an intuitive is to present all sides of a situation and possibilities to my clients without taking their power away from them.

The answer you may be seeking may often arrive in the form of riddle or a question. Know this and choose wisely. The information is there. The choice ... yours!

Happy Birthday Dad

Today would have been my father's 96th birthday. I had an emotional moment yesterday...and today. One of loss and remembrance. Rather than wait until Father's Day, or the anniversary of his crossing -- June 26th, I want to celebrate his life on the day of his birth.

Because of his love, wisdom, philosophical nature, willingness to roll up his sleeves to help someone in need, and genuine desire to be a "Mensch," I took his words to heart. He was my first spiritual teacher. In his mind, pursuing my passion, at that time, acting, was unacceptable to him because he didn't want to see my heart broken. However, developing my intuitive and mediumistic skills, participating in his meditation circle, and playing with Tarot cards was very much encouraged.

I once said, "If I had one-quarter of his psychic gifts I would be extremely blessed." Now that I am the age he was when he encouraged me to pursue this path, I realize I have surpassed my teacher in many ways. He enjoyed being the armchair psychic for a small group of individuals. An armchair was was not enough for me. I had to be the performer, even if it was not on the stage. I ventured out into the world with a mission to change the image of psychics, something I don't think he would have ever done. I will continue to entertain, enlighten, and empower as many people as I can using my gifts until the day I can no longer function. I know he is proud of me, even though he is not physically here to tell me that. There are times I "feel" him around...and that, is the best feeling of all!

My present to him, posthumously, is remembering how much he has influenced my life. So, Dad, the acting training helped me be a better entertainer, speaker, and teacher. I'm pretty fearless in the spotlight and grateful for having followed in your footsteps -- sort of.

A few years ago, I found a typed snippet among his clippings. I put it on my refrigerator. It says, "When money is lost -- nothing is lost. When health is lost -- something is lost. When character is lost -- all is lost." I think I would like to replace the word character with the word integrity. My father was a character who read people's character...and so do I. He was a man of high integrity and I am grateful to have learned from the best!!

Faith

When all else fails, there is faith. The other day, when I emerged from a meditation, the memory of a conversation I had with a former neighbor of mine popped into my head. As with all things that "pop" for me, it leads me down a road that includes memory rushes of various related incidents from my life. Without disclosing a private conversation with the Internet world, I can say that I was and still am in awe of my former neighbor's faith in God.

While the world is filled with many different religions and belief systems, the one constant I find is nearly everyone believes in some sort of a Creator -- a higher power. I like that concept because it allows for everyday miracles and provides a sense of faith -- a belief that if things are good, we are blessed, and if things are not good, we are blessed because we learn to appreciate what we have, the experience, and know that things will change and improve. They always do. This is my belief.

As I have gotten older, I have become more tolerant and understanding of people's beliefs, but I have become less tolerant of closed minds. Getting back to my day of faith, I realized, at least for me, that the word faith is very important today and every day. Without faith, negativity creeps in, fear takes over, and our light dims. Faith illuminates the darkness. I chose this card from Sasha St. John's Gentle Wisdom from the Faerie Realm deck because it reminds me exactly about trusting and having faith even when there is no indication otherwise.

Faith keeps us alive, hopeful, optimistic, and able to handle whatever comes our way.

Faith is what helps us over the hump when we are afraid of the future or the unknown.

Faith is the word for today and every day.

Faith is our ability to believe when there is no local or tangible reason to believe.

Faith is trusting that you can thrive, even when it seems as though the deck (Tarot or otherwise) is stacked against you. It's only a cycle.

Faith is the one word that you can grab onto to support you when nothing else is there to do the job.

Faith is the bridge, the conduit, the connection to the future.

Faith is the star in the sky that twinkles -- the one you wish upon.

Faith is what is needed when you have nothing to encourage you to to continue to trust.

Faith is what it takes to move forward even when you don't know where you are going. The Creator does, and if we embrace our ability to have faith, we can manage our fear of the unknown. Everything will be all right, no matter how it seems at the moment.

Am I a bit redundant? Possibly. Does it matter to me if I am redundant? No. What matters to me is, "Did I remind you of something wonderful to latch onto today?" I hope so.

KEEP THE FAITH, BABY!

Relationships - Blessings from God/Goddess/Creator

Today, I would like to focus on the blessings we receive from God/Goddess/Creator. We are in the middle of a Mercury retrograde that provides us with one humongous, sneaky wallop. Some retrogrades are mild, some are overtly destructive, and others are...well they are all unique. This is a time when communications get snarled, relationship end, jobs end, relationships start, jobs start, computers act up (and I've had them crash and a few have literally burned), and all sorts of communication snafus may arise.

The day before Mercury went retrograde, I felt on top of the world, that I could do anything and the energy was light and perfect. The next day, I was knocked literally on my bottom. Thus, the flow of energy. So, as the avid surfers in SoCal are looking for that perfect wave, I am just riding the wave of energy moment by moment, day by day.

This past weekend, I was in San Francisco having a wonderful time at SFBATS. I enjoyed the company of my peers living in the wonderful world of Tarot. We explored many different concepts, uses, and the history of Tarot, etc. I felt like I was back in the loving, caring arms of old and new friends. When I looked over my notes from a few of the workshops I attended, I discovered that there were gaping holes in my notes and most of what I wrote down did not make sense. Retrograde? You betcha.

Mercury retrogrades are noted as optimal times to clean up old business and take things low and slow. They should be welcomed because they have a purpose -- to bring us back to ourselves and our humanity. Some of us find it a little difficult to stay focused during these weeks. It can be hard to not let our past come and bite us where we sit. Staying positive and optimistic is not always easy when we look down that dark tunnel with a speck of light at the other end, but we manage.

Today was a special day for me. While taking care of some personal business of mine, I became a bit emotional and shared my thoughts and feelings with the wonderful person on the other end of the telephone. I had spoken to her in the past and I know she deals with a lot of people, so I didn't expect her to remember me personally. I'm just a name and an account number. I thanked her after she put in a request to expedite my application. I don't remember what I said next, but she told me, "You always make me laugh and it brightens my day." I asked her, "You remember me?" She said she remembered my name because the last few times we spoke no matter what my day was like and my concerns, I always made her day. I do that a lot and I don't realize the impact I make on people. I like to make people feel better -- lift their burden. My father wanted me to be a mensch. I guess he got what he wanted, posthumously.

When you open your heart and share your spirit with others, you can make a difference in the world. By performing acts of kindness and support, when someone needs it, you will find that when you are in need, someone will give back to you.

Use this Retrograde energy to remove any people from your life that are toxic so that God/Goddess/Creator can replace that negativity with love, understanding and joy. Sometimes we need reminding that as difficult as life can be at times, a little light shines through and someone gives back to you.

Tell someone you appreciate them today ... and every day.

Relationships - Misunderstandings

Do you realize how important it is to be and have a good friend? Assuming you are there when your friend needs you, are they there when you need them? What happens if you either deliberately or inadvertently say or write something to your friend that hurts their feelings?

Taking it another step further, what happens if you tell your friend the truth and it's not what he or she wants to hear? Perhaps you shared your feelings and your friend misinterpreted your words and intentions? Maybe they reached out to another person for their opinion, and a wedge was then put into your relationship, possibly destroying it forever? That hurts very deeply, I am sure. If your fears and issues had not entered the picture, would this relationship continued to go on unscathed? Probably not. More than likely something else would have come up over time to test this relationship. The issues in relationships are always there. Misunderstandings always happen. It's how we handle them that matters. Take care of yourself and take your time when dealing with your desire to express yourself. You should be able to live comfortably with the results of your verbal or written choices.

My mother used to say, "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." I think she may have been right. No one likes confrontations. No one likes to be wrong. No one likes to feel that they have been taken advantage of, not been given a chance to apologize and have that apology accepted, or be given a chance to explain what they felt, what they did, and why.

The best thing you can do is to be thankful for the experience, understand that possibly your trust and fear issues may have gotten in the way, and maybe there was a good reason everything turned as it did. That's the hardest thing to accept because you may not have the answer to that for some time.

My intuitive and practical suggestions would be to accept that your relationship is no longer the same. This would allow both of you to find your own way in life -- focus on your own stuff and allow each of you to grow in different directions. Over time, you may realize that you had spent more time helping your friend achieve their dreams, and you had let your own languish, or was it the other way around?

Perhaps down the road, enough time and distance will allow you both to reconnect in a positive and forgiving way.

Is there a solution for this? I think so. I recommend learning to be comfortable in your own skin. These types of things will always happen. Own up to your words and know that as long as you live your life with honesty and integrity you can find peace in knowing you tried to do the right thing. In time, perhaps your friend may realize that you were only trying to express yourself, and you wanted to let them know how you felt. In the meantime, say a prayer or two for all of you, send them your love and good wishes for their journey and be grateful for having traveled that road on your journey through life.

Open Hearted

Today I asked for guidance from Sasha St. John's Gentle Wisdom of the Faerie Realms inspirational cards. (You can find her artwork and this deck at http://www.sashastjohn.com/) The first card I drew was Opportunities, but since I am in the process of creating beneficial opportunities and letting inappropriate opportunities pass me by, I asked for another card -- one in which I could focus on for inspiration and healing. As always, when I take a moment to focus, whatever deck of cards I choose -- Oracle or Tarot, it always supports me. The card that appeared on cue was entitled "Open Hearted."

I live Open Hearted. I need to protect my heart and emotions every day. Why? Because I am just hard-wired that way. I am a professional intuitive. I care about people who come to me for whatever reason. I want to help them. That is what makes me who I am. The Internet has provided us with an opportunity to find nearly anyone that we lost touch with over the years. What a wonderful gift we have been given -- the ability to reconnect with people from our past. On the other hand, sometimes we need to disconnect from people in our life, too.

Living with an open heart can create problems, because sometimes we hurt the people we love. Relationships are difficult because we have issues, hot buttons and wounds, and sometimes we let them get in the way. Today I lost a friend. I let her down in her time of need. What she may never know is that her pain was also mine. I let her terminate our friendship because I could no longer watch her make mistake after mistake. I turned into my mother. I am a know-it-all bitch. Oops. Did I make a mistake? Probably. I tried to share my wisdom and experience with her and explain why certain people do what they do, but she was unwilling to see my point of view. I still love her and will always have her in my prayers. I wish I could talk to some people in a way that does not hurt either of us, but being silent and not commenting is difficult for me.

I may be a strong person, but being an empath is not easy. I can be abrasive at times and I spew and vent and complain because that is how I get rid of the pain I feel from being an open-hearted, loving person. While I know this behavior is not considered healthy, I know it helps me release the pain I absorb. People who know me, know that I mean well and they understand that there are some things about me that I cannot change. It is not that I am unwilling to change, there are somethings that I just cannot change.

When I read for people who have relationship issues, I remind them that you cannot make people change. People will change if they want to, or if they can. When a relationship runs its course, it is because it has reached an impasse. I reached that point today. I could have accommodated my friend and made her feel good, but I just couldn't do it anymore. It was too painful for me to just listen and be "positive" because my realistic, practical side took over. I cannot change who I am. I acknowledge this fact. I can modify my behavior to a certain extent, but there comes a time when I cannot bend anymore. My close friends accept me as I am -- good, bad and indifferent, and I accept them exactly as they are, too.

The reason this friendship has come to an end is that I could not be the type of friend she needed/wanted. There are some personality traits that I possess that can be modified, but for the most part, I cannot walk on eggshells in any relationship for a long period of time. My close friends and others who know me, know my faults and understand that sometimes I am not a pleasant person. How does one protect an open heart? You do the best you can and hopefully that is enough. I would like to know how you protect your open heart and not feel such intense pain. Please share your thoughts and ideas with me. Thank you.

Tolerance for the religious or spiritual beliefs of others

I was by raised parents who made a lot of mistakes along the way. I remember how my dad asked me several times when I was in my late teens and early twenties, "Did I do right by you girls?" I told him, "Yes, you did." He really did. He walked his talk no matter how difficult it may have been at one time or another. He had a problem with parents who had a double-standard. He said, "I don't want to tell my kids to do as I say, not as I do." For the most part, if he did something, we could too. He did his best to set a good example for us.

I believe we have agreements prior to our birth--we choose our parents, siblings and connection to other individuals. Everything is for personal growth and life path. We are constantly cleaning up and creating karma. I give my dad credit for helping me form my beliefs. He was a spiritual man whose father could have been a rabbi, but due to the practicality of the era in which he lived, grandpa Rappaport became a tailor. If things had been different, my father would have been a professional psychic and metaphysical teacher. Instead, I have become what he was unable to do, plus I teach Tarot.

Tarot is one of my greatest passions in the world--if not the greatest. I am most fortunate to be able to share my knowledge of Tarot and intuitive gifts with others. My students and clients come from every conceivable background that exists except for the very devout and born-again religious people. Some individuals judge me as an evil person because of my work with Tarot and my unconventional beliefs. What a shame. Their minds are closed, and they have become intolerant of the beliefs of others. Do I intend to do them harm? Never. Do they accept the religious teachings their spiritual leaders provide to them without questioning? I think so.

I went to Sunday School, Hebrew School, learned a little Hebrew, and had my Bat Mitzvah when I was thirteen. I am still in awe of the power and energy that radiates from a group of people gathered in a synagogue praying during a Sabbath or Holiday service. While I have attended other houses of worship, I don't feel the same way I do when I am in a synagogue. Perhaps that is because of my upbringing. Of course, I don't attend services regularly anymore. I practice what has been taught to me--live an honest, good life on a day-to-day basis.

I have attended other houses of worship and while most of their services do not resonate with me, I am always delighted to see their icons, stained glass windows and feel the energy of their prayers. Prayer is power. Prayer is love. All beliefs should be respected provided they do not include causing harm to others. Perhaps that is why I see Wicca as something very special--a nature religion that believes we should "Harm no one." Wicca is not evil nor is Tarot. In our world today, religious persecution still continues.

I know that the power of the Creator is everywhere and if I reach out in thought and/or prayer I will feel an immediate response. Is it from an angel, archangel, fairy, deceased loved one, saint, spirit guide, or God/Goddess himself/herself? I do not know. Does it matter? Not to me. It's the power of love. I still pray for world peace.

When I do a reading for someone either privately or at an event, I do not judge them. My job is to entertain, enlighten and empower them so they can make the best, possible decisions they can when dealing with life situations. While I may not personally approve of someone's actions, I neither condemn them, nor do I preach to them in any way. I try to present all sides of a situation, and provide them with enough information and ideas so they can move forward. My prayer for them is that they will make the best possible choice in whatever situation they find themself. They have free will. I always pray that I have "done the right thing by each and every person who sits down with me for a reading."

I have adopted the term: God/Goddess/Creator when referencing a higher power than humanity. I have read for people of the following faiths: Jewish, Catholic, Christian, Russian/Greek Orthodox, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, and Unitarian. I have also read for agnostics. While there are other religions in the world, I have not encountered them in my travels. However, I am open to being of service to them in a universal way.

I really want to love, honor and respect all people in the world, but I am wise enough to know that this can never be because there are people who hurt and/or murder with no conscience, or in the name of religion. Those who do so in the name of religion are referred to as terrorists. Not all people will like us. There will be people that we will not like. Tolerance of bad behavior is not the same thing as tolerance of the religious and spiritual beliefs of others.

To quote Anne Frank, "In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. I simply can't build up my hopes on a foundation consisting of confusion, misery and death. " For other quotes from Anne Frank, please visit this link: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/a/anne_frank.html.

In summary, we need to be more tolerant of the beliefs of others as long as they are not harmful to someone's physical well being.

Unconditional Love and Boundaries

Yesterday was Mother's Day. I needed a day to reflect on what I wanted to say regarding this day of celebration. Today, I found my voice...

Over the years, I have met several Zen Buddhists who were able to live on what I call "the edge." They were able to completely love and trust everyone that they encountered on a day-to-day basis. They appeared to be in a state of bliss. It is unimportant whether or not they used drugs or alcohol to arrive at, or maintain their calm, Zen-like state of being. Where are they now? What are they doing? If they are still Zen-like, where has their life led them? I wonder. Because I am a practical, intuitive, creative person, I find that I cannot be Zen-like for very long. I have moments. They come and go. I cannot trust everyone, but I can love unconditionally—with boundaries.

Within the past week, I experienced several situations that have made me revisit the concept of unconditional love regarding mothers. My mother was wonderful, but she made a lot of choices that were detrimental to my well being. I believe she had good intentions. She was not externally warm and I was a hugging, kissing little girl who always wanting to learn and share what I learned. When I came home from school, I often found her cooking dinner. I sat on the footstool in the kitchen chattering away about what I learned in school, my classmates, and many of the hurts I endured from being different. She listened. Many years later when I asked her about it, she said, "I just let you talk it made you feel better. I guess she never really "heard" what I said or truly understood me, but she did know that I needed to talk—get things off my chest.

She was cut from the mold where you lied to your children to either protect them or get them to behave. I know many people who have raised their children this way. I know she wanted the best for daughters, but I was not like my sister. I have always danced to my own drummer, defied convention and fought for right and wrong--the underdog and in often cases, was the underdog. Because of this, I have always sought the life of service—providing wise guidance to help people heal their wounds. I use my intuitive abilities (often with Tarot cards) and with the guidance of spirits, angels and other helpful entities to make the best choices in my personal life. These guides are always on board to help me provide my clients, and those who I am privileged to read for, with as much information as possible. It is all about making choices. I believe if we approach any conflict or negative situation regarding our mothers with love and understanding, we will at least feel that we have done our best. It is about relating to one another, listening and trying to understand each other’s point of view. Sometime it doesn’t work.

As a daughter, I always wanted to buy a special present for my mother on Mother’s Day. When I asked her what she wanted, she always said, “I want a good girl.” The message that she gave me with that statement made me feel that I was not a good girl and I made Herculean efforts throughout my life to be honest, ethical and more than a good person. It took me a long time to understand her. She used that statement to control me and to get me to do what she wanted me to do. Needless to say, something in side of me fought her tooth and nail. Several years before she died, I asked her what she would like for a Mother’s Day present. She always said, “Save your money.” Once a bookkeeper, always a bookkeeper! When I did buy her presents, I could see how moved she was. Yes, she was raised the same way she raised me.

I learned unconditional love from my cats. No matter how they behave, I love them, forgive them, and treat them beautifully because they are unselfish and know how to give love and comfort. I also love my friends the same way—unconditionally. No matter what choices they may make, or how much we may disagree on various things, we are always there for one another and our differences help us to grow and become better people.

While I would like to love everyone in the world unconditionally, I know I live on the planet earth. It would be very foolish for anyone to love or trust strangers unconditionally. That’s where intuition and common sense come in handy. We really don’t need to love the whole world and all of the creatures on it. We just need to learn to understand and accept our differences. Boundaries help to keep relationships healthy.

Just before my mother died in 1991, I asked her, “When did you finally accept the choices I made for my career?” She replied, “When I knew no matter what I said or did you were going to do what you wanted to do.” I was 38 at the time. Yesterday was Mother's Day. I still love my mother…unconditionally.

Retrograde Mercury-Bringing the Past Forward

The "demoted" Planet Mercury goes retrograde on May 6th and lasts through May 30th. The best thing you can do for yourself is to back up your computer. There is quite a bit of information available on the Internet about Mercury retrograde, so I will just stick to the basics. Because Mercury rules communication, (emails, mail, phone calls, deliveries, etc.) things can go a bit haywire. People can lose jobs, relationships break up, packages get sent to wrong addresses, and the list goes on. (I avoid ordering anything that needs to be sent via UPS during this time period unless absolutely necessary. Why? Because I have had packages lost, stolen and misdirected.) I have lost emails and data when computers crashed and burned under Mercury retrogrades. Last year, the one I used at the office fried. Why that one and not my home computer? Because my home computer was a "new" one. My worst Mercury retrogrades tend to be the ones in January. So, I am hoping this one is a bit easier than the others.

PRECAUTIONS
What can you do to help yourself? Back up your computer. Make sure you are clear when you communicate with others. Being on the same page is very important. Follow up with people to make sure your faxes or emails are received. Check your calendar to make certain you don't miss appointments or deadlines. Don't start any new projects. Don't sign any legal documents unless absolutely necessary, and then make sure everything is crystal clear. Be extra careful driving. I think you have the general idea about how to work with this type of energy.

ADVANTAGES
What can you do under Mercury retrograde that would be advantageous? This is a time to do your spring cleaning. Get rid of what you don't need/want. Reconnect with people from your past. I started doing that a few days ago. I found a drawer full of business cards from 1995-1996. I have been scouring the Internet trying to find if the addresses/businesses of these entrepreneurs are still valid so I can reconnect and network with them again. While some of them now have thriving businesses, others have found new careers or jobs, and some have disappeared altogether.

The gift of this time period is reconnection. I started reconnecting to people a few days ago and the rewards are unbelievable. While time has, indeed, moved foward, it also appears to stand still (Mercury stationpoint). With this retrograde, I can bring the past into the present and make a new future for myself. I hope you can do the same. The rewards are amazing. Call someone you haven't spoken to in a long time. You will make their day--or not, depending on the relationship. We all can use a bit of karma cleaning, too! Do you have a Mercury retrograde story you wish to share? I'd love to hear it.

The Swan

Synchronicity brought the image of the swan to me this morning. An email I received from my friend, Pat Serafin, contained the attached picture. The story of "The Ugly Duckling" came to mind when I viewed it. Many of us go through life looking at the world and wanting to fit in--to belong. We want to be loved and appreciated for our unique selves. That does not generally happen. What do we do instead? We strive to conform in order to be accepted and not humiliated. We adopt defense mechanisms in order to protect ourselves. It takes many years to learn how and when to lower our defenses and trust, but the damage done during our early childhood and adolescent years sometimes take a lifetime to overcome. It's all about self-esteem.

Today Spirit directed me to use Medicine Cards. After shuffling briefly, I pulled the Swan. The swan is all about Grace, accepting your intuitive abilities and surrendering to self-transformation. Swan medicine.

Spirit is taking me into more than one direction, today. I received several emails containing the YouTube performance of Susan Boyle's rendition of "I Dreamed a Dream" from "Les Miserables" on "Britain's Got Talent 2009." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

I have listened to it several times and I am totally moved by the beauty of her singing voice--her instrument. Her ability to interpret this powerful song brought me to tears every time I played the clip. If you are fortunate enough to see the 7 minute version of this show (link listed above), you can see how the audience originally judged her based upon her appearance. After she began to sing, the audience was so moved that they suspended all thoughts and judgments. They were transported to a wonderful place and experienced something phenomenal. Susan Boyle is swan. She finally has her chance at a singing career. I am guessing they will also give her a makeover--a little powder and paint, a nice hairstyle and perhaps a little haircolor, too. That would be nice for her.

This brings me to the subject of skin-deep beauty--our youth-chasing world! Botox, Juvederm, Restylane, Radiesse and other injectables are used to combat character lines and aging. Apparently, the media and society continue to tell us that we are not young enough, pretty enough, thin enough or rich enough. Mother Nature finds beauty in all ages and all creatures. When I look in the mirror, I see an older version of myself. I see the vertical lines forming around my mouth, a few wrinkles here, and there and my favorite, the crinkles around my eyes. A good moisturizer helps, but would I do anything to alter my face with the toxins everyone else is rushing to use? Absolutely not! I really enjoy seeing how I have aged both mentally, physically and emotionally. My college education in biology and chemistry has not been wasted. It has taught me that anything you do chemically to a biological system will have not only the desired effect, but it will also create problems--unwanted side effects. I keep my skincare regime simple, and fortunately I have benefitted from staying out of the sun. What example would I present to the world and to the people who come to me for a reading if I altered my appearance? Not a good one, I am sure.

I am fortunate that I have the ability to read into people's souls when I work events reading Tarot cards, Palms or objects. It is my responsibilty to help that person with their issues in a positive life-affirming way while providing entertainment. Do you have any idea what it is like to read for someone and their forehead never moves? Eyes, faces and energies used to match. That is not always the case anymore. When I work certain events, I can see the good/bad injectables and sometimes a little nip and tuck. This is when I shut off my brain and I trust the information I receive from Spirit.

What is my point today? It's about becoming a Swan--self-transformation with grace. It's also about self-esteem and just putting it out there to live your dream. It's about looking your best. It could also be a reason to complain about toxic injectables too. Most definitely.

...and the Angels Speak

As I opened my box of traditional "Angel Cards" looking for a message for today, one card stared at me--openly, brazenly and with humor. The word was PLAY. When we were children our idea of what constitutes PLAY changed as we became adults.

For me, PLAY is my work--my passion--reading Tarot, palms, coffee grounds, and objects. However, I often forget that playing a computer game is PLAY and not wasting time. As an adult, PLAY should be viewed as a release of energy that helps center us in some way--or provides balance. We must make time to lighten our energy in order to release stress.

This leads me to the next two cards which came out to PLAY together--BALANCE and FLEXIBILITY. It's about balancing our lives--making room for PLAY without feeling guilty or unproductive. We should find a way to incorporate some sort of PLAY into our day. That would create BALANCE.

FLEXIBILITY works with BALANCE. FLEXIBILITY allows movement; it keeps things lively--in motion. If we have complete BALANCE, we risk becoming bored and our lives could become stagnant. BALANCE should have movement. Without movement, there is no growth. The words FLEXIBILITY and BALANCE bring to mind the Wheel of Fortune in the Tarot deck. While the wheel may spin, it does not always stop in a "good place," but it is a good reminder that equilibrium is key to staying positive.

The next angel card that appeared was one bringing ABUNDANCE. Today, she reminds us that we should never ask for ABUNDANCE alone. This could lead to an ABUNDANCE of things that we do not want in our lives. We should, instead, ask for ABUNDANCE of all good things, or ABUNDANCE of the positive things we want to experience. We must be specific when we use broad words. To explain this further, I was provided with two more words from the Angels: POWER and BIRTH. It is about using your personal POWER to give BIRTH to yourself. It's about creating the life you want to live. It's about using your mind, heart and soul along with the hand you were dealt to find a way to manifest the quality of life you want, and to do the work you were born to do. In other words, use POWER to give BIRTH to yourself, your projects, etc.

Use your POWER wisely, my friends, in order to bring ABUNDANCE of all good things into your lives. It's about creating magic in a loving, empowering way.

The message/lesson from the angels today consists of PLAY, BALANCE and FLEXIBILITY, ABUNDANCE, and POWER and BIRTH. They tell us to remember to play and enjoy each day. Find a way to BALANCE your life so that you are productive and maintain FLEXIBILITY. Ask for ABUNDANCE by using your personal POWER to give BIRTH to whatever you need to make your life better without trying to control the outcome.

Today is a day to create magic by lightening your heart, mind and spirit.